The Murk

It’s been some time since I’ve posted in this journal. And the last few times I did, I had AI heavily involved.

I’m feeling a mess of things, and I’d like to record what I’m feeling now as I lead up to a Wiznotherapy session tomorrow!

When I first reached out to be considered for the opportunity, I kinda felt that I would be picked. I get a sense from where I’m at, that momentum will be beginning to build as I’ve spent the last couple years orienting myself and my path forward. The arrow is being released.

After receiving the confirmation email (I had only read the subject line), I had to go for a walk. Just a bit of slow pacing and breathing. I could feel a refreshing swirl of possibility and I wanted to ground myself in the reality of the situation, to get clarity on what’s realistic. From this space, it will be much easier for the conversation to flow into something unknown. So yes, quite nervous about the whole thing. But that passed.

Today though, I was racked with frustration, accusation, resentment, lot of story rolling around. Stuff that I thought had residing, but has resurfaced as new light is shone on a dark place.

So, ‘what do I want?’, was the question posed to me. What a vision of the life I wish to live.

It looks like this.

Curiosity, Awe,and Grace lead the way. I choose to say ‘yes’ to opportunities. I allow the momentum of life to build. Like a hug, I embrace the entropy that has protected me, kept me safe as I navigated the best I could. And gratefully, I say goodbye as I embrace a new friend.

To clear mental bandwidth, to cultivate mental spaciousness to bring magick into each day.

Magic is connecting to our innocence, imagination, wonder, and the Creator within.

Magic is perceiving the things, events and people around me as another facet of myself, and then acting accordingly.

And it’s fun to pull back the curtain to show others how to direct their own marionette.

It’s all pat of guiding each other Home.